Good Intentions Microwave Cake/muffin

Microwaves may be evil (see my last entry), but this cake is so nutritious it’s actually good for you. So you can call it a muffin. Even if it has chocolate chips.

This is FAST, flexible, allergy-friendly and really tasty.

Get a mug. The narrower it is the taller your cake will be. Don’t preheat anything.

First, pick your structure: Flax seed meal is a good base, you can use only that, or you can substitute part of the volume with almond meal (my fave) or ground hemp, or another seed or nut meal. My preference is half flax and half almond. Put 1/4 cup of this (total) in the mug.

Next, add cocoa if you want the cake to be chocolate. Muffin. Whatever. My favorite is from Frontier Herbs and is a dutch-process organic cocoa. It mixes really nicely and tastes fantastic. Trader Joes makes a good one too. How much cocoa you add is up to you, but it should probably not be more by volume than your nut meal. You can leave cocoa out entirely if you’re doing a fruit muffin.

You’ll need a couple hearty pinches of baking soda. Or, if you really want to bother getting out a measuring spoon, 1/2 teaspoon. I never bother.

Add cinnamon or other spices if you so desire. Don’t add too much. This is one tiny cake.

Mix the dry ingredients with a fork.

Into the dry ingredients you will need to add

1 egg. I don’t think egg replacer is going to do it on this one. Sorry. If you have access to duck eggs, one duck egg is perfect for this recipe if you’re using cocoa. But one chicken egg is fine. Or you can even use “one egg’s worth” of eggwhites. You need something that does what egg does in the microwave, which is basically cook as fast as it foams. This is essentially a microwave souffle. Much less tricky than the real thing.

2 tablespoons (at least) of liquid sweetener. This can be honey. Or maple. Or karo. Or even sugar free pancake syrup. But you need both the liquid and the sweet, You can use a tiny bit extra if you are using a lot of cocoa. I use honey if I have it and maple if I don’t.

Vanilla, if you want.

Other flavorings (orange zest? almond extract? the blood of the innocent?) as needed.

Raisins or blueberries or chocolate chips or…? Chocolate chips are a fave here. chocolate chips and raisins together make extra sweet not necessary.

Stir it all with a fork until it is a nice batter with no dry spots.

Stick the whole business in the gateway to hell microwave and microwave for about 90 seconds. If your first shot doesn’t cook all the way through, nuke it for an extra 15 seconds or so until it is firm and springy to the touch. If it seems overdone, do your next one for 60-75 seconds instead. I’ve got a reasonably powerful but not overpowered microwave and 90 seconds is perfect for us.

Pull the cake out. Run a knife around the cup. Turn it out on a plate and cut it into wee wedges if you want, or just grab a spoon and dig in. Particularly good with a smidgeon of ice cream or whipped cream or just a tall glass of milk, but works well all by itself.

This is very high fiber and filling. It is not low fat, but the fats in it are very healthy fats.

Still sick, slowly mending

but the internet is still funny. This little exchange between me and my cousin on Facebook still has me giggling. Backstory: Someone was talking very self righteously about how they don’t have a microwave because microwaves “change” food. So I did a quick google of “Microwave ovens are evil” and landed on this gem:

“Microwave ovens are evil, and that they cook food by opening a trans-dimensional gateway to Hell, and it is the heat from Hell that cooks the food.”

Which amused me so much I posted it to Facebook, where one of my brilliant cousins said, “2.4Ghz radio waves are microwaves. This the same band as wifi which is used to access the Internet. The Internet is full of sin and sinners. Hell is full of sins and sinners. The Internet is Hell. Wifi transmits Hell. 2.4ghz radiation is a gateway to Hell. Microwaves cook using a gateway to Hell. Yup, the logic is sound.”

 

This wouldn’t hurt so much if it didn’t hurt so much

Kailea moved out today. I’m so proud of her–she took the bull by the horns and got herself a decent first job and a place to live.

The part that hurts is that I’m super, duper painfully sick right now–sore throat, fever, chills, ear ache, did too much sick.

Cas is moving out on Tuesday morning, early.

To say that I am overwhelmed is an understatement. Both are making positive steps forward in their lives, figuring out how to be grownups, doing the things you do when you’re 19 and 20 and starting out in the world.

But oh my heart I will miss them. K is 15 minutes away in light traffic, half an hour in heavy. I will likely see her once or twice a week. Cas… I don’t know when we’ll see Cas again, off into the wilds she goes, first Nebraska and then Montana.

This means that starting Tuesday it is my job to get Shiny to school, watch Miles all day, pick Shiny up again, cook dinner with two kids and no buffer. Sounds like less than many of you guys deal with, but on top of that I’m sick, plus there’s also the background of fibro and hypermobility and pretty much always being in pain if I’m up and doing. I’ve been so lucky to have the time I’ve had with backup, but I’m going to be flying solo and that would be a lot less scary if I didn’t feel like ass.

Today I got an award lauding my organizational skills. I had to work hard not to laugh hysterically. I’m good at inspiring people. I’m good at systems. I’m lousy at maintenance and I wonder if they’ll still like me if it all comes crumbling down once I don’t have help.

Miles is also feverish and sick, limp and listless, we were at the park and he just stayed quiet on my back and spent some time nursing–he’s been a ball of energy for months, it was almost scary.

Tomorrow my husband celebrates his “birthday observed”… long story. But I will be primary with the kids. Mothers day they will let me sleep, thank god.

Allie is back at Hyperbole and a half. Every few months I worried about her, wondered how things were going. Sounds like I was right to worry, but I’m glad if she’s found her way out of the morass that depression is. I’m doing my best right now to fight it, but it feels like I”m fighting vampires with marshmallows.

If I wasn’t in such pain right now, I might be able to have a better attitude about things. But my skin burns, I feel every fiber of my clothing, my throat is full of knives and moving is hard.

I know I can do this, mostly because I won’t have any choice. If I come out the other side, it will be as a stronger, more capable human being. Which sounds like a good thing, but also too exhausting.

Little things… our hang tag expired, and I’m not getting a new one. Bye, easy parking. We’ll see how long I can go without–I could get another without trying very hard, but I”d like to see if i can manage without.

Our food budget is going to be cut almost in half. And this makes me so sad.

We have new people moving in. New people. Yay. But they’re not family. Maybe they’ll be family. Maybe they’ll just be tenants.

I hired a housecleaner. She is fast and competent and worth every penny.

I bought new bras. Only to discover that the primary reason the old ones fit was because they were stretched out. I can close them, they’ll have to do (same size and make as the old ones, super cheap price, but right now I feel every thread.)

 

Some Nights (Parenting Style)

TTTO: Some Nights, by FUN

For my hubby’s birthday, because he likes it when I filk.

Some nights you stay up way past your bedtime.
Some nights you sleep on the floor
Some nights you cuddle and you go to sleep so easy
Some nights we don’t sleep at all

But you still get up at 6 am
Oh lord, I did not know what I was in for
Oh no, no (what am I in for)
Oh no, no (what am I in for)
Most nights I don’t know, anymore

Oh woe oh woe oh woe no no
Oh woe oh woe oh woe no no

They call this the mommy wars? What are we fighting for?
Who wrote these stupid rules already
Don’t you start to believe the hype
It’s never even black or white
Try so hard to get it right
But it never works the same way twice

It’s all right (it’s all right)
Had the baby in my bed last night
Stopped my son from wondering where I am
where I am, where he is
oh where am I, mmm, mmm

Well some nights I wish that I had my own bed
Cause I could use some sleep for a change
But some nights I can’t to sleep without my kid
Some nights we get it right, I get it right

And we still wake up, I will see your face
And oh I know exactly what I stand for
Oh yeah, yeah (What do I stand for)
Oh yeah, yeah (What do I stand for)

This night, I do know, so come on

So this is it. I gave up my freedom for this?
Lost my shape and sagged for this?
Became my mom or dad for this?
(Yeah, come on.)

No, when I show you stars, you see, you see the stars, they’re not so far
When I sing songs, they sound like this one, so come on,
Oh come on, Oh come on, oh come on!

Well, the books, folks, every one, toss them all in the can
Decades of this, nobody will quite understand
Just do the best you can
Hold them close and let them go
Sorry if it’s not enough, they’ll figure it out themselves in a while

They said you were a mistake, that I was ruining my life
But when I looked first into your eyes
Girl, you will always be the most amazing thing that could come from
That terrible time… ah…

Oh, whoa, oh, whoa, oh, whoa, oh, oh,
Oh, whoa, oh, whoa, oh, whoa, oh, oh

The other night I walked the floor just you and me
held you close and we both agree

It’s for the best we didn’t listen
It’s for the best we didn’t distance oh